Impending First Day at Big School!
In exactly three weeks Miss Edith will set off for her first day at ‘big school’. Over the last few months I have spent a lot of time thinking about this day as i’m sure many of you have. It’s a weird one because it’s filled with mixed emotions. On those challenging of days it can’t come quick enough, but on those less challenging of days I want it to be further away. I won’t lie, there have been tears of varying nature. John has been subjected to irrational tears, sad tears and tears of joy and pride at seeing Edith try on items of uniform.
Emotions are in over drive at present because uniform preparation is in full swing and there really isn’t very long to go. As I sit down this evening to tick things off the never ending list and check we have everything I ponder what this means for our little family. Edith is very excited and has great delight in telling everyone what she is about to do. I hope and pray this lasts and that excitement stays and doesn’t get replaced with anxiousness.
Edith is diddy and I had a big reminder of this today when we attempted to get school shoes. Whilst many of her peers are at least a 9 or 10, she is only just a size 7. The particular shop we went to didn’t have anything in her size and so we came away empty handed and both of us feeling a little disappointed. Edith asked if any shop will have her size and I promised her they would. Fingers crossed for Sunday when attempt number two takes place. I know she is ready in many ways, but there are still stark reminders of how small she is and what a big undertaking school is for her and us as parents. Am I ready for her no doubt change in behaviour and attitude, increased cheekiness, tiredness, homework, new friends, upsets when nasty things are said, expensive holidays, even greater inquisitiveness, the joy of being able to read and write and the relentless routine of school? Who knows, but bring it on I guess!
I have also been feeling guilty of late. Work has taken over and I don’t feel I have necessarily given her the best summer. This may sound ridiculous, but I doubt i’m alone in thinking this. Have I been a good parent, has she had a good and fun 4 years in the run up and have we had quality time together? On the whole I hope yes, but maybe not so much in the last couple of months. It doesn’t help when she asks why I am working a lot or ‘always doing something to a bit of furniture’ as she put it today. My latest trick is to get her involved as this pic demonstrates!
We are very lucky to live in a wonderfully supportive village with wonderful people and deep down I know Edith will be fine. This is just the next chapter and though it may be a daunting one it’s exciting nonetheless and I can’t wait to see how my beautiful and funny daughter grows and becomes even more brilliant. Big up to all the newbie school parents out there, we can do this 🙂